The Daily Sports Poem's Fearless Super Bowl Prediction

In a week of endless prognostication
Here's one prediction guaranteed to come true:

The Red Hot Chili Peppers will suck at the halftime show
Because they always do.

Thunder v Heat: The New Rivalry

Russell v Wilt
Magic v Bird

The new title tilt,
If you haven't heard

Is Durant v LeBron.
This is going to be fun.

Juan Mata and the Future of David Moyes at Manchester United

Depending 
On overspending
Is a temporary solution.
37 million buys a stay of execution.

The Pro Bowl Reviewed in Verse

Adding Rice to a dish does not make it less stale
The pick-a-side Pro Bowl was destined to fail,

Further discouraging casual viewing
With team colours so garish they'd have Keith Haring spewing. 

Li Na Wins the Australian Open

It's quickly over
As Li Na

Takes Cibulkova
To the cleanas.

Rafa Nadal: The Post-Match Dilemma

After a match would you have the courage to shake Nadal's hand,

Having seen how many times he's picked his shorts from 'twixt his prostate gland? 

Explaining Andy Murray's Australian Open Defeat

On the day
Federer
Was betterer.

Peyton Manning vs Richard Sherman: The Post-Championship Interviews

Peyton, the epitome

Of the corporate employee

Delivering rehearsed banality.

Heaping praise on Tom Brady,

A shining example of southern gentility

Reconfirming his marketability.

Sherman’s verbal assault on Michael Crabtree

Reflects the hard reality,

Of a violent game played violently,

Which, in all honesty,

Is what America tuned in to see.

Your indignation is pure hypocrisy.

Denver 26, New England 16: Instant Review in Verse

A week of Belichick's nefarious planning
Fails to halt the onslaught of Demaryius and Manning.

Vancouver 3, Calgary 2: The Canucks Drop The Gloves, Again

Tortorella's rage
And an eagerness to engage
Do little to assuage

An unmistakeable feeling
That the fights are concealing
A team heading down from its competitive ceiling.

Oklahoma City 127, Golden State 121: Kevin Durant's Big Night

To score
54
On any floor
Is impossible to ignore

An OKC
MVP?
Pick up the D
And he
Could be.

Oklahoma City 104, Houston 92: Reviewing the Rockets' 19-point second half

Houston, we have a problem.
For one half you're awesome,
The other, you're rotten.

A collapse historically epic
With effort pathetic.
A night best forgotten.

A-Rod, Lance Armstrong and Instant Hindsight

A-Rod and Armstrong forever connected
Their artificial achievements now detected.

From admiration to humiliation, 
Their protestations impossible to believe,

But if you think only cycling and baseball deserve PED condemnation
It is you who is being naive. 

Worst. Mascot. Ever. The Haiku.

Life imitates art

As the Cubs resuscitate

The Ghost of Poochie.

The AFC-NFC Championship Games Previewed in Poetry

The top seeds won, but were hardly dominating
This Sunday a visiting team will be celebrating. 

New England 43, Indianapolis 22: The Best Coach in the Game

The Patriots’ decade of excellence

Proves there’s little defence

Against intelligence.

Bill Belichick’s

Bag of tricks

Is one win from Super Bowl number six. 

The Return of Bobby Petrino

Congratulations Louisville for ending speculation

That college football is remotely connected to education

After heading to Western Kentucky to poach

America’s most morally bankrupt coach.

The lone lesson his players learned?

How to cross a bridge already burned. 

Dennis Rodman in North Korea

One would hope

That it turns out

Rodman

Was a spy

All along.

Not a dope

Selling out;

A flawed man

Wondering why

It all went wrong.

Florida State 34, Auburn 31: A Great Game Nearly Ruined

The Kings of Cultural Appropriation
Are official the best team in the Nation.

No argument that the better squad won

Despite the brilliance of Tre Mason.

A clash with Winstonian heroics required,

And confirmation that Musburger needs to be fired. 

San Francisco 23, Green Bay 20: The 49ers Victory Analyzed in Verse

Quickness
And Kaepernickness
Overcomes extreme cold
And the occasional unpenalized hold.

Indianapolis 45, Kansas City 44: Andy Reid's Bad Dream

A 30-minute Chiefs deflation
Takes Andy Reid from vindication
To humiliation.

Ole Gunnar Solskjaer Comes to Cardiff City

Things get bizarre

As Ole Gunnar

Solskjaer

Becomes Cardiff’s potential saviour.

I give it less than a yar

Before he says au revoir.

Jay Cutler's 7-Year Deal

While not the solution for what the Bears need
Cutler's signing doesn't make them poorer.
But $54million guaranteed
Is steep for a quarterback with no heroic aura. 

Johnny Manziel at the Chick-fil-A Bowl

Sponsoring Manziel's last college game shows visionary marketing ingenuity,
A change from Chick-fil-A's usual campaigns of homophobia and animal cruelty.